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Tokyo Gore Police

Extremely Short Version: OMGWTFBBQ!?!?! He… and then she… and then WTF!?!?

This screencap is but one of many images that express the movie's bizarre body-horror aesthetic: tinyurl.com/c9bndx

Short Version: if a violent, action-packed police-corruption movie happened in David Cronenberg’s brain around the time Videodrome was made, it would bear a striking resemblance to Tokyo Gore Police.

Long Version: I pressed play on Tokyo Gore Police knowing only two things other than the title: that it comes form the same company that brought us Machine Girl, and that it features a bizarre commercial for stylish wrist-cutting equipment. This was enough to make me pay the fifteen bucks for an iTunes download, and i gotta say, it was well worth it.

TGP begins with just another day on the job for Ruka, a professional monster hunter for the privatized police force - fighting a chainsaw- handed mutant who can sprout new weapons from any injury he receives. These weapon-sprouting types are becoming increasingly common. They’re called Engineers, and get their powers from a key-shaped tumor somewhere in their body. Shoot em, something grows from the bullet hole. cut them, something grows from the cut. They’re pretty damn hard to kill unless you chop them into small pieces very quickly. Thankfully, Ruka’s as good with a chainsaw as she is with a sword.

And thus begins Tokyo Gore Police, 109 minutes of fire-hydrant level arterial spray, dismemberment, and biomechanical mutatation. It’s in Japanese, with subtitles, but it’s mostly just cackling, screaming, and gore, so you don’t have to read if you don’t want to. It has a main plot about finding the source of the Engineers, a sub-plot about avenging murdered parents, and many, many opportunities to rip, chop, or slice something off of someone and spray the camera (and everything in a five-foot radius, for that matter) with blood and mutant body-parts.

– review by Doktor Holocaust