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The Top XXX Cliches of alt.sex.stories

www.modemac.com/cliches.html

Welcome to The Top XXX Clich├ęs of alt.sex.stories, compiled by the users of the newsgroup alt.sex.stories. This is a list of some of the most over-used, over-abused, and outrage writing faux pas seen on the newsgroup.

You can edit this list right now! This list is a wiki, hosted by Cast Iron Chaos. Simply go to the bottom of this page and click on the command to "Edit this page." Feel free to PL33Z @DD 2 THa L!ST!!!!!!

The best quotes from this list will be added to the permanent archive at: http://www.modemac.com/cliches.html


All women love to swallow.

All women have tight, firm butts.

Coeds never wear bras and panties.

Older men always prefer younger girls, no matter how air-headed they may be. Older women are desirable only to younger, teenaged boys…but fortunately, those older women are more than willing to teach those teenage boys how to do it right.

A guy's dick reaches its full length of nine inches by the time he's 13 years old.

A woman / girl's hymen is several inches deep in their vaginas.

Men's cumshots always "shoot", or "explode", no one dribbles in the world of A.S.S.

Any woman who doesn't have enough money to pay her bills will really enjoy banging the other guy. That's just a favor. Honest.

Any woman is always ready to have sex, say, 30 seconds after actually seeing the guy for the first and last time of her life. (no comment)

Everyone in town is having sex in a well lit room which is visible from the street, alley, side of the house.

Your brother/sister/mother/father will always be willing to go along with you to commit felony sexual assault/criminal trespassing by watching strangers have sex in their homes.

People become stealhy ninjas when watching other people have sex/masturbate. No one breathes, coughs, sneezes.

No one masturbating in an alley watching someone else have sex is ever caught, the alleys and streets are DEAD when voyeurism is occuring.

12 year old boys can last forever the first time they have sex. They never experience premature ejaculation.

Preteen girls always have a hint of budding breasts. They are almost never flat chested. In the event that they are flat chested, the inevitably have puffy, swollen nipples.

Pre-teen and young teen girls always have a "hint" or "smattering" of pubic hair. They are never hairless, and god forbid they have fully developed pubic areas.

Teenage girls are always willing to wear their friends panties when their panties don't meet their friends approvals.

Pre-teen girls undeveloped vaginas can always take the full length of an adult males 9 inch penis.

Pre-teen girls are ALWAYS aroused at the sight of a mans penis, they are never scared. They NEVER tell their parents.

Pre-Teen girls are always capable of having an orgasm the first time they have sex. They can experience orgasm through vaginal intercourse, perhaps even multiple orgasm!

Any woman sexually assaulted by a criminal (bank robber, assassin, etc.) will immediately and willingly join him/her in his/her life of crime, rather than going to the police and offering them a two-for-one criminal special.

That enormous dog with the 14-18 inch penis is always right out in a flash when the woman decides she wants to get out from under even if she just got that basketball of a knot lodged inside her.

Beverly Crusher has the nicest ass in the galaxy. Even Wesley cannot resist getting an erection when he sees her.

Whenever a girl gets dumped, her best friend, who happens to be a lesbian, comforts her before the two girls start to have wild lesbian sex.

All women have their orgasms either enhanced or triggered by having their ass slapped when being fucked doggie style.