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Weekly World News

Elvis Is Alive! Bat Boy Joins The War On Terror! UFOs To Invade Earth On July 5th!

(No, wait, that last one is TRUE…)

Easily the most popular and well-known weird news magazine out there, the great Weekly World News provides its readers with a weekkly serving of the most outlandish and obviously fake news available. And the best part is, it can be found in nearly every supermaket check-out counter in the USA! WWN's rival The Sun recently changed its format to focus more on fad diets and celebrity gossip, but WWN remains true to its mission of basing an entire weekly publication on made-up "news." Their Web site proclaims what they report is "not really news – or is it?"

But alas, it seems that the venerable WWN has become a victim of the Conspiracy, like so many of us. Due to legal pressure, they have recently been forced to print a disclaimer on their credits page:

Weekly World News articles are drawn from different sources and most are fictitious. Weekly World News uses invented names in many of its stories, except in cases where public figures are being satirized. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental. The reader should suspend belief for the sake of enjoyment.

Oh, right! Like we really NEEDED that statement to help us tell the difference between fiction and fact! But then again…this world is so crazy, maybe some of the stories printed in WWN really ARE true. And at least the Page 5 Girls are genuine!

Rev. Susie the Floozie on WWN: "It's never attained the heights it did in the late '70s-'80s era. I have some headlines in my files like BIGFOOT STOLE MY WIFE! They made an editorial attempt to hide the obvious bogosity of the rag and I liked that--the recent couple decades have reduced it to a snarky smirkiness that puts me off. And the Photoshopping is so easy now. Back then, the guy writing the Ed Anger column was fucking APESHIT! He sounded like a REAL RIGHTWING LOON, and he was always pig-bitin' mad!! And the advice to the lovelorn columnist (I forget, it was Dottie I think, not the later Babs, but I could have them mixed up) was fucking VICIOUS--one letter from a sensitive lesbian pleaded for understanding got Dottie's sensitive response: I had to handle your letter with TONGS because it was covered with yucky lezzie germs!!! Oh, how I miss them."

Death and Resurrection

In the fall of 2007, the Weekly World News suddenly stopped publishing…and no one knows why. (Maybe it was a conspiracy!) The magazine suddenly announced in its headline that it was the FINAL ISSUE OF THE WEEKLY WORLD NEWS!, and that was it. It may have been killed by the Internet, based on a report in March 2007, when parent company American Media said that sales of WWN in 2006 were "only 83,000 per issue." But even after publication ceased, the Weekly World News refused to die. Its sister tabloid, the Sun, published a WWN section in each issue…and then, in late 2009, the Web site suddenly became active again! It turned out that one of the paper's biggest fans, Neil McGuinness, formed his own company called Bat Boy L.L.C. and bought the name and rights to the Weekly World News. The paper currently exists as a news blog, updated daily, and it covers the subject most near and dear to WWN. An October 2009 article in Famous Monsters of Filmland suggests that the new company plans to expand past the printed page:

"Talent agency CAA has signed tongue-in-cheek supermarket tabloid Weekly World News to a representation deal. Specifically, the deal was made with aims “to take the focus off the page and into film and TV entertainment, theater, comic books and merchandise,” according to WWN CEO Neil McGuinness, who bought the publication about a year ago." – [1] Famous Monsters of Filmland weblog, October 13, 2009